I take the L.

I've taken experiences, learned from them, taken questions and tried to give others advice about whatever the situation may be for this website. But somewhere along the lines I made myself out to be someone who doesn't care or is too "savage" to handle emotional problems. My followers are very used to booty pics and selfies but I'm about to get very honest and personal. - 

In May I went on a family vacation and I got very sick. During that time I went to the hospital and found out there was a deeper issue that needed to be taken care of and with that I had to take meds. The side effects of the meds made me extremely depressed. I wasn't posting on my website, I wasn't posting on social media, I was barely leaving my house. I lost all motivation and drive to do anything. I would've done anything and everything to go back to my normal self. I would've done anything to feel anything but emptiness. 

My point of sharing that is that before I got sick, I had a "fuck it" attitude. I had my mind set on one thing and one thing only and that was myself. Don't get me wrong, this entire movement is on self love and confidence and trust me I had it, but it was more than that. I didn't allow myself to feel anything strongly and saw it as a distraction if I did. That was one of my biggest mistakes. What I've come to realize is that acting like you don't care doesn't fill that hole in your heart. Money and success are great of course,  but again won't fill that hole in your heart. What will fill your heart is feeling.  Fighting for something thats worth fighting for. I've always felt a little too deeply and cared a little too deeply and for some reason I felt that I needed to hide that or get rid of that part of me. But trust me when I say ladies you can be both strong and caring at the same time. Not everybody has the same heart as you and you will break your own if you think that way. You were not made to mask your feelings in order to look more tough. Instead, act on it. Fight for whatever it is and put your whole heart into it no matter what the outcome may be. You are only "too much" for those who cannot handle you, and that alone will show you who does and does not belong in your life. Trust that you were made a certain way for a certain reason. I've gotten real tired of learning how to "win" the game by pretending I don't care. Instead, I take the L. 

"I gave you $10 and he gave you $20..."

The truth is..